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On Being a Single Guy...

They're people, too, and are also looking for love and lust just like couples and unicorns.

In this exclusive SDC member story, we have an impassioned open letter to the swingers' dating world about giving single guys a try. Read on and open your minds and hearts to this often undervalued member of our community.


We do grow on trees, and we can be purchased almost everywhere at the current price of a dime a dozen.

My name is Single Guy, and we are legion. And we don't get much respect in the Swinging world.  If the Single Bi-Girl is the prized, elusive Unicorn, who is to be treasured, then the Single Guy is more along the lines of a dirty, smelly Stray Dog.

Second-Class Citizens

We are eternal second-class citizens, paying extortionate prices to get into a club (even if a couple brings you) and browsing profiles that go out of their way to say "NO SINGLE MALES!!!!!!" or "We are looking for couples, women, and SELECT SINGLE MALES" (just wondering- does this mean you are not selective about your couples and single women? In that case, you might as well just say, "We'll fuck anyone and anything, except for SINGLE MALES. WE ONLY WANT SELECT SINGLE MALES!"

Yes, Some are Jackasses

I get it. A lot of us single guys are kind of stupid, sex-obsessed, rude, and crude jackasses. Some of us more, some of us less. Unfortunately, I fear this is due less to us being single and more due to us being male. Oh, how many times have I posted an ad for a woman or couple and received a response from some single guy hoping desperation might make me less selective (it doesn't). It will happen whether I say NO SINGLE GUYS or not. So I just accept it as inevitable and stop being annoyed.

Guys in a Couple, Remember: You Used to be Single, Too!

What is funny though, is that (and I don't think I am going out on a limb saying this...) for every couple out there (except for the lesbians) at least one member used to be a  SINGLE MALE. You earned a promotion.

Have you forgotten what it was like in those dark single days?  All those times you spent forever trying to come up with the perfectly clever email that showed all the reasons the couple should pick you (as they requested you do), knowing that you probably won't hear from them. A unicorn, on the other hand, need only send her picture and an address, and within minutes a limo with a heavily armed escort will be heading to pick her up and bring her safely to the couple.

Even if you pass the audition, you exist to serve a sexual purpose, are expendable, and will likely only play with the couple once or twice. It will be rare — no matter what people may tell you — that you will form a friendship.

Take a Little Pity on Us

It isn't exactly the easiest of existences. So, on behalf of other SINGLE MALES out there (including even the stupid dumbass ones), I ask the couples and the unicorns of the swingers' world to take just a little pity on us. We might be single, and male, but we are still people, dammit!  #weshallovervomeoursinglemaleness  #singlemalesneedloveandlusttoo

This letter was submitted by a member of SDC. Become a member today and read more — maybe even submit your own story!

Member Stories

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  • Anonymous
Jul 06, 2021
Because women are more open to letting husband or partner play with another female, but still close minded to see his women with another male….
Dec 16, 2019
Lol...I feel his pain.