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The Art of Kissing

Dr. Jess     
In this excerpt from her book The New Sex Bible (2014), Dr. Jessica O'Reilly shares kissing techniques to help you heighten the intimacy in your relationship.

Excerpt from The New Sex Bible (2014) by Dr. Jessica O'Reilly

A Sexologist's Guide to Kissing

Foreplay Sexual Health Couples The Art of Kissing Dr. Jessica O'ReillyThough kissing may be a deeply entrenched dating and mating ritual in our culture, many cultures have prospered without locking lips, which serves as a reminder that kissing is an erotic art (as opposed to a reproductive imperative).

Making out results in a flurry of feel-good hormones that promote relaxation and bonding. Yet the sexes view it differently. Men are more likely than women to seek and initiate deep-tongue kissing, and they tend to utilize it as a means to an end (sex), whereas many women report that they view kissing as a barometer with which to gauge their lover’s commitment and monitor their relationship status.

How Men and Women View Kissing

[caption id="attachment_2962" align="alignleft" width="300"]Foreplay Sexual Health Couples The Art of Kissing Dr. Jessica O'Reilly Source: The New Sex Bible (2014)[/caption]

Which ever way you view it, smooching plays a prominent role in seduction, romantic attachment, and sexual arousal. Unfortunately, in long-term relationships, we often stop kissing or push passionate kissing aside in favor of other forms of foreplay. And while there is no universal hierarchy of sex acts, research suggests that kissing is not only good for your health but also promotes happier relationships. In one study conducted by behavioral scientist Kerry Floyd, couples who were instructed to kiss more often reported fewer fights, greater relationship satisfaction, less stress, and lower cholesterol in comparison to couples who received no instruction regarding kissing.

Despite the mounting evidence that getting to first base is good for you and your love life, keeping things fresh can be a challenge.

Grab your partner and try the following suggestions and techniques designed to keep you happy, healthy, and very much in love for years to come.

Kissing Tips From Dr. Jess

The Soft-Lipped Kiss
Some people believe that the world is divided into two types of kissers: soft-lipped and firm-lipped. But the reality is that our sexual style varies according to our mood, just as our appetite changes from day to day. If your lover seeks romance and often needs help relaxing to get in the mood, slide your lips gently against his with only featherlight contact. Take your time and gently pucker his lower lip between your lips, allowing your easy breathing to slow his breath rate and send his body into a state of deep relaxation.

Lip Lining
Give your honey a peek into your oral skills as you masterfully trace your tongue around the curves of her lips, paying extra attention to the thin skin in the corners where the upper and lower lips meet. If her lips remain closed, sensually slide your tongue from one side to the other just inside the crease.

[caption id="attachment_4319" align="alignright" width="355"]Foreplay Sexual Health Couples The Art of Kissing Dr. Jessica O'Reilly Source: The New Sex Bible (2014)[/caption]

Sweet Spot
You’re probably familiar with the frenulum of the penis, but this sensitive connective tissue also exists just inside the lips. Slide your tongue inside and twirl it purposefully around the shallow space between his upper lips and teeth before moving on to deep, French kissing.

Basic Tongue Twirl
As you press your lips together, tilt your head slightly to the side and suck gently as you twirl your tongue around hers.

Top-Shelf Kiss
Swipe your tongue along the roof of your lover’s mouth, a sensitive and often-neglected area.

Code Word
Kiss your lover out in public at every stoplight, or come up with a code word (e.g., thank you or fun) and stop what you’re doing to French kiss whenever you hear this buzzword.

Hold one another by the cheeks as you kiss deeply and passionately. The face is the most sensual part of the body but receives little attention in the way of touch.

Enjoy my kissing techniques, and remember to always practice safer sex! Images and excerpt from The New Sex Bible (2014) by Dr. Jessica O'Reilly

Dr. Jess

"An award-winning speaker, Jess has worked with thousands of couples from all corners of the globe to transform their relationships via her wildly successful Marriage As A Business program. From Prague and Istanbul to Albuquerque and New York City, her relationship retreats receive rave reviews from some of the most powerful couples in the world who are drawn to her enthusiastic, practical and no-nonsense approach to happily ever after. Jess's doctoral research focused on sexual health and relationship education and she is passionate about accessible, classroom-based education. When she isn't globetrotting for speaking engagements, she volunteers with students, teachers and social service organizations to empower young people to embrace healthy, happy relationships. As a global ambassador for several brands, Jess contributes regularly to the biggest names in international media. You'll find her advice weekly in the likes of Women's Health, Men's Fitness, Cosmopolitan, SELF, Showtime and The Movie Network. Her insights into couple' issues reaches millions of homes across America as the host of the hit reality series Swing, which just capped its fifth season on PlayboyTV. Canadian-born and Chinese-Jamaican and Irish by descent, Dr. Jess loves ultimate frisbee, crab, airplane turbulence, cheese and red wine. Makes perfect sense, right?"
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