5 Lies We're Told About The Female Orgasm
Dr. Jess     
The female orgasm is a wondrous thing, but when it comes to understanding the phenomenon, misinformation abounds.

Instead of comparing ourselves to porn stars (actors) and fictional characters, a little re-education is all we need to feel more empowered and have better sex. Read on as we dispel some of the top myths about the female orgasm.

The female orgasm is a wondrous thing, but when it comes to understanding the phenomenon, misinformation abounds. From the exaggerated displays in mainstream porn to the sure-fire simultaneous and almost non-stop orgasms of Fifty Shades of Grey, it’s no surprise that confusion and feelings of inadequacy have become the norm.


Myth: The louder the screams, the bigger the orgasm.


Thanks to the fact that most of us learn what sex looks and sounds like through porn, we are misled into believing that earth-shattering screams are a sure-fire sign of female pleasure. This is simply not the case. The sounds we make during mind-blowing orgasms can vary from a satisfying sigh or deep exhale to piercing grunts and wails.

In fact, research now suggests that the noises women make in bed (or in the backseat of the car) are more related to their partners’ pleasure than their own. The vast majority of women (87%) report using their “copulatory vocalizations” (scientists love to make sex as unsexy as possible) to boost their partners’ egos and 66% scream and moan to speed up the process and get it over with already!


Myth: Women take much longer to reach orgasm than men.


I’ve heard many a frustrated man complain that women are a lot of work, but this isn’t always the case. When it comes to intercourse, women certainly take longer to reach orgasm, but while masturbating, women only take an average of one minute longer to climax.

Intercourse isn’t always designed for female pleasure, so think about getting your hands, mouths and vibrating props involved in partnered sex to heighten orgasmic response.




Enjoy and remember to always practice safer sex!

Dr. Jess

"An award-winning speaker, Jess has worked with thousands of couples from all corners of the globe to transform their relationships via her wildly successful Marriage As A Business program. From Prague and Istanbul to Albuquerque and New York City, her relationship retreats receive rave reviews from some of the most powerful couples in the world who are drawn to her enthusiastic, practical and no-nonsense approach to happily ever after. Jess's doctoral research focused on sexual health and relationship education and she is passionate about accessible, classroom-based education. When she isn't globetrotting for speaking engagements, she volunteers with students, teachers and social service organizations to empower young people to embrace healthy, happy relationships. As a global ambassador for several brands, Jess contributes regularly to the biggest names in international media. You'll find her advice weekly in the likes of Women's Health, Men's Fitness, Cosmopolitan, SELF, Showtime and The Movie Network. Her insights into couple' issues reaches millions of homes across America as the host of the hit reality series Swing, which just capped its fifth season on PlayboyTV. Canadian-born and Chinese-Jamaican and Irish by descent, Dr. Jess loves ultimate frisbee, crab, airplane turbulence, cheese and red wine. Makes perfect sense, right?"
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