PREMIUM
[article_total_comments]
Transforming Love: Jessica Fern & David Cooley on Shame, Attachment & Polywise Relationships
Jessica Fern & David Cooley on Attachment, Resentment & Rewriting the Rules of Non-Monogamy
Guests: Jessica Fern (author of Polysecure, Polywise, and Transforming the Shame Triangle) and David Cooley (restorative-justice facilitator, creator of Restorative Relationship Conversations).
Episode Summary
In this heart-to-heart, Adam & Pris sit down with Jessica Fern and David Cooley to go deeper than "What is polyamory?" They unpack attachment styles, why resentment is jealousy's sneaky cousin, and how the Shame Triangle (inner persecutor, inner victim, inner rescuer) quietly shapes conflict—and how to transform it with practical tools rooted in IFS and restorative practices.
The convo hits real-life dynamics: ditching the "50/50" myth, navigating capacity and time (especially with kids), and why relationships thrive when both partners bring 100%—just not in the same way every day. Adam & Pris get candid about their own poly chapter, burnout, and finding balance, while Jessica & David share how their post-divorce collaboration became one of their healthiest partnerships.
COMMENT
