Bringing Love, Peace and Hope into Your Relationships: Part I
I’m not going to lie: This week has been very hard for me.

Reflecting on the Rev. Dr. Martin Luther King, Jr.’s message of love, peace, and hope in his “I Have A Dream” speech, I’ve realized that we need these reflected in our lives every single day.

I’m not going to lie: This week has been very hard for me. After my partner and I broke up this weekend, I struggled to think about how I could incorporate love, peace, and hope after such a traumatic moment in my life. But after awhile, I realized that this is such a perfect message for me and really, for everyone, to create love, embody peace, and be hopeful for the future.


Creating love in your relationship is probably the easiest for people. This is about building intimacy, giving kisses and hugs, engaging in sex, and embracing the person for who they are in your life. Love is reflected in the things you do and the things you say. Love is in the aura you have around you, what gets people to love you, and gets people to embrace you.

This week, I saw the love my friends had for me and I realized how the support system I had was carried in a love so deep that it’s unbreakable. That creation of love that we’ve started is so solid that it literally has carried me through my sadness, grief, and loss. I’ve had my ups and downs this week, but that kind of love is everlasting and that is how I’ve been able to embody peace.


Embodying peace is being able to be one with yourself, despite the chaos and stress in your life. So the question is: How do you gain your peace? I gain my peace by using forgiveness (for other people and for myself), engaging in breath-work, meditation and doing yoga. I’ve had to do a lot of that lately. Maybe your peace comes after you say, “fuck everything!” or after yelling or screaming or punching a pillow. I’ve done a lot of that, too.

In a relationship, embodying peace is not only loving the people you’re in relationships with, but also embracing their blessings and faults. If you don’t embrace those, you can’t be at peace within yourself. Believe me, I’ve tried. As soon as you start creating a sustainable, peaceful situation in your body, that’s when you can start to be hopeful.


Being hopeful for the future is a bit hard for me, at this particular moment in time, but I know I’ve been in this situation before, so that gives me hope already. Since I’ll never shut myself off from love or keep myself from embodying peace, I know that hope is always on the way. MLK had hope for the future and I’m reminded of that every single day when I talk to my friends, when I visit my social media or when I’m teaching. My relationships with all those people give me hope for the future. Your relationships with the people in your life should give you hope for the future, as well, as long as they are positive forces in your life. Hope is what we have to hang on to. Hope is what pulls us forward in the right direction.

Creating love, embodying peace, and being hopeful should be embedded in your everyday moments, even in your sexual life. You know what? That will be Part II! Cheers to your sexual success!

Marla Stewart

Marla Renee Stewart, MA is a professional sex, intimacy and relationship coach and sex educator. Not only is she a lecturer at Clayton State University, she is also the co-founder of the Sex Down South Conference and the Sexual Liberation Collective. Gaining her reputation for being "The Sex Architect", she created Velvet Lips to empower people of all ages to embrace, educate and enjoy their sexuality and their sexual lives. She has studied human sexuality for more than 16 years at San Francisco State University and Georgia State University, respectively, and has expert knowledge in a wide variety of subjects. She has published academic articles and continues to do sexuality research. She has conducted workshops at conferences, not-for-profit and private organizations, as well as universities in the Atlanta area. She has been featured on many radio shows, documentaries, books, magazines and has been invited to speak at Universities around the country. She also sits on the board for the Atlanta Harm Reduction Coalition and SPARK Reproductive Justice Now!
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