Z is for Zest
Do you have a zest for life? A zest for love?

Do you have a zest for life? A zest for love? How can you create more zest in your life and in your lovemaking, and sexual connections?


Feeding that Zest


What foods are important for creating zest, energy and sexual libido? Everything we put in our bodies and on our bodies affects our libido, self-image, health and well-being. My partner and I have a nutritional book published by Penguin Putnam that highlights how the body works electrically and what foods either diminish life force or help enhance your energy and libido. The book is called Electrical Nutrition, published in 2001. And for a more recent, concise easy-to-read book on health, check out Ageless Beauty, Healthy Beauty by Denie HIestand, published 2017. I also recommend the documentary, The Magic Pill.

I came into this world full of energy and always had a zest for life! I recently found out that I have an extremely high testosterone level that I was probably born with, which could explain the doctors surprise when I came out a girl! They were expecting a boy! Needless to say I have always been very active, done a lot of sports, been VERY sexual…


Nourishing Your Body


But then I noticed my energy dwindling. I could no longer climb the highest peaks (literally -- having been to Nepal many times), and my body was not keeping up with me. I blew out a lung, damaged my lower back, blew out my knee, and started feeling emotionally drained, and struggling to live the life I wanted to live. Luckily, at my lowest point, I met my life partner who was a natural health consultant. He took one look at me and asked how long I had been a vegetarian. He said I had totally mined my body.

I was malnourished, lacking in the essential building blocks of life. I had starved myself of protein for more that 12 years. I was Vegan for most of that time avoiding all animal products and derivatives from animals. I was on a crusade to save the planet and thought by being Vegan I was doing my bit to stop the cruelty to animals. But I was actually being cruel to myself! I was mistreating myself. Not giving my body what it needed to be a fully functioning, sexually active young woman! It took a bit of convincing, but I realized he was right. We are omnivores and need essential fatty acids, some protein and veggies to fully nourish our cells.  

I slowly introduced eggs, cream, and cheese. Then branched into fish. And eventually introduced red meat, mixed in with veggies in a stir fry and slowly my body, and my brain started to come back to the vibrancy I had before. I was still very conscious of not supporting a food industry that mistreated animals so sourced my meat from outdoor, grass-fed happy cows. And the same for my vegetables and fruits. I sourced organic, fresh produce. As I mentioned in J for Joy, the energy we put into the food we eat and what we do in life can affect our health and the health of the people around us. The same if we look at where and how our vegetables, fruit, fish, chicken and meat are grown and raised. What energy do you want in your body? You want to be happy, healthy and full of sexual energy, so look at what fuel you are ingesting. Choose that which has a high vibe as that is what will be you!

Not only is it important to look at what you put in your body but also at what you put on your body. Most mainstream skincare products contain petrochemicals and preservatives which if used on a daily basis for years and years can eventually lead to hormonal imbalance, a toxic overload and possibly downstream, cancer.

I highly recommend theCream.com skin care range. Award-winning food for the skin. With a whole range of healthy skincare for the face, body and intimate areas.

Whatever you can do to not overload the body with toxins, chemicals, and unhealthy products and foods, the better your health, your self-image and your libido will be.

We only have these bodies through which to experience this life and love, so do what you can to minimize any toxic overload and make healthy choices in your food and also your skincare products.

Hormonal balance is also key to a positive state of mind and continued sexual energy. I recommend DutchTest.com for a comprehensive hormonal panel outlining the sex hormones and brain hormones, for women and men. Sometimes it can be an easy fix to bring the body back into harmony by balancing out the hormones. Give it a go!


Z could also be for Zodiac


What star sign are you? And how does that relate to your sexual connections and your relationships?

Recently, on a swingers cruise to Cuba, I did a Sensual Zodiac workshop which highlighted different sexual qualities associated with each person’s star sign. It tied in with the theme night on the cruise and it was fun researching the different star signs, sexual compatibility, and music to resonate with the different zodiac signs. The more we know about ourselves and each other the deeper our relationships can become. Maybe this is something you would like to explore more… SDC handed out a fascinating and informative Sensual Zodiac Chart on the cruise which tied in nicely with my workshop.

A quick summary for you:

Aries (March 21-April 19) Fiery hotties, demanding, impulsive and highly active lovers who like to “take the reins!” Try some full-on rock 'n' roll music to inspire these Rams! Enjoy the physicality of this star sign and ground your energy through sex.

Taurus (April 20-May 20) Sensual, passionate lovers who love touch, smell, tastes, kisses, and nibbles. Choose some sensual music to encourage soft touches while you ride that Bull!

Gemini (May 21-June 20) They love variety so try changing things up, and doing some dirty talk. Activate the fire in this sexual powerhouse, by playing some upbeat, fast-moving music.

Cancer (June 21-July 22) Experimental and erotic. Show them love, with your touches, eye contact and cuddles. Play some music that inspires sensuality.

Leo (July 23-August 22) Passionate and dramatic. Honor them as the sexual Lions and Lionesses that they are with compliments and back scratches. Another high-energy star sign, so choose music that encourages you to affirm how awesome they are. Honor them!

Virgo (August 23-September 22) Play some Marvin Gay, and get it on with these intelligent, lusty lovers. But be respectful and honor the fact that you are making love to a Virgo! Allow yourself to go deeper and be ready for some moaning… express yourself!

Libra (September 23-October 22) Perfectionists. Extremely giving, but love reciprocation. 69 is a great position. They love to give and receive. It’s all about balance. Some sexy Latin, hip-moving music works well with these lovers.

Scorpio (October 23-November 21) Horny, highly sexual beings with insatiable appetites. Experiment with dominance and submission. Bondage anyone? Try some fast-paced sexual music like Rihanna’s S&M song.

Sagittarius (November 22-December 21) Sexplorers who see sex as an adventure. Playful, optimistic, and carefree. Do something outrageous to ignite them… Sex outdoors? Let’s get Physical (Olivia Newton John) would be appropriate for this star sign.

Capricorn (December 22-January 19) Ambitious and freaky. Dedicated to pleasure and take pride in their sexual achievements. Try some role-plays or other sexual fantasies with some accompanying high-energy kinky music like Born This Way by Lady Gaga.

Aquarius (January 20-February 18) A brilliant air sign, they revel in breaking the rules and exploring pleasure. Try incorporating some sexy toys.

Pisces (February 19-March 20) Spiritual lovers who love going deeper. Explore slowing lovemaking down and doing some eye-gazing and sensual massage with accompanying flowing music.

Check out what star sign you are in the Chinese Astrology too, which is based on the year you were born. Each sign has an associated animal so try embodying your astrological animal, for example, the Year of the Rabbit! Doesn’t take much to work out what lovers born in that year love to do!




It’s all fascinating, and adds to a deepening and understanding of our loved ones. Whatever we can do to keep our relationships alive and full of sexual zest! I encourage you all to be the sexual adventurers that you are, and explore all that there is to be explored sexually. Wishing you all the best and continued success on your journeys! I am available to host workshops and private sessions focused on enhancing what you already have and making this world more sexually joyful! You can reach me at info@DrShelleys.com. Thank you for taking the time to read Dr Shelley’s A-to-Z of Sex. Stay tuned for more educational blogs.

Dr. Shelley

Originally from New Zealand, now based in Las Vegas, Dr Shelley has a PhD specializing in human sexuality and in particular open relationships and polyamory. She is the author of Soul Sex, and the Anti-Aging & Health Benefits of Sex. Dr Shelley teaches small group intensives, workshops and has been working with couples and individuals for 20 years focusing on making the world more sexually joyful. She is excited to share her latest writings Dr Shelley's A-Z of Sex.
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