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Connecting Your Sexuality & Spirituality for Christians

I don’t think I've ever thought as much about connecting my spirituality to my sexuality until I moved to the South.

I don’t think I've ever thought as much about connecting my spirituality to my sexuality until I moved to the South. Being here in the Bible belt in a melting pot of folks from around the world, Atlanta has its interesting quirks that aren't as prevalent as they are in other parts of the country.


Spirituality and Sexuality Around the Country


For instance, growing up in California and spending years in San Francisco, it felt more sexually liberating to me (I grew up in a small-town suburb of Sacramento). The amount of knowledge I gained there highly contributed to the work that I do now. From sex work to sex clubs to sexual attitudes, kids were informed and embraced their sexuality. Adults challenged current sexual trends, embodying sex felt natural. To feel sexual meant to feel spiritual, and I always stayed connected.

In Atlanta, there is a major separation with spirituality and sexuality. Some of my clients (married ones!) have such a hard time embracing that sexuality and spirituality go together. I was grateful for a church group that I did a workshop for because they got it. They understood the need to be sexual and spiritual and that God intended for us to have sex and use sex as a way of bonding, a way of release, and a way of manifesting our dreams.

However, for most people, this isn’t the case. A lot of people have learned to feel shame around their sexuality and their bodies and they don’t know what pleasure even means to them and their sexuality. Church has become regimented as a “something you do” rather than embracing the pathways of worship to be energetically in-tune and to hear God.

If you find this to be you, there are several things you can do to change that and connect your sexuality and spirituality.


Pray & Meditate


A lot of Christians just pray before mealtime and this is the only praying that they do. Believe me, I've met and dated A LOT of those. Praying and meditating go hand-in-hand. To be spiritually in-tune, you must learn to request what you need and listen to the answers. If you want a better sex life, request it! And afterwards, listen for the answers by meditating. God will show you how to get there.

P.S. God is the voice in your head that tells you to do something, but is often ignored because we sometimes don’t trust ourselves. Then, we end up regretting a course of action later.


Channel Your Sexual Energy


This will look different for everyone. Basically it’s connecting your sexual energy to the universe. I personally call mine “Yoni Yoga” where I imagine all the good of the world entering through my root chakra and feeling all that energy right through my crown. Then, I take that energy, feel the electric buzzing that it gives me and use that energy as I go out into the world. It’s truly a compliment to all of the good energy that I have received. (And I will definitely have a video of what I’m talking about coming to you soon.)


Before Sex, Pray


I know this is probably going to be the hardest for you if you've felt a major separation between your sexuality and spirituality. However, you can start off with a simple prayer said in your head (although it would be better out loud), saying something like “God, thank you for being with me on this sexual encounter. Please ensure me a great time.” It’s simple and quick and when you start feeling more connected, you will be able to say more and truly be thankful for the wonderful time that you had.




Always remember that sexual energy is the most powerful energy and when it’s tapped into your spiritual self, there are so many great benefits that you are completely entitled to have. Cheers to your sexual success!

Marla Stewart

Marla Renee Stewart, MA is a professional sex, intimacy and relationship coach and sex educator. Not only is she a lecturer at Clayton State University, she is also the co-founder of the Sex Down South Conference and the Sexual Liberation Collective. Gaining her reputation for being "The Sex Architect", she created Velvet Lips to empower people of all ages to embrace, educate and enjoy their sexuality and their sexual lives. She has studied human sexuality for more than 16 years at San Francisco State University and Georgia State University, respectively, and has expert knowledge in a wide variety of subjects. She has published academic articles and continues to do sexuality research. She has conducted workshops at conferences, not-for-profit and private organizations, as well as universities in the Atlanta area. She has been featured on many radio shows, documentaries, books, magazines and has been invited to speak at Universities around the country. She also sits on the board for the Atlanta Harm Reduction Coalition and SPARK Reproductive Justice Now!
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