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Y is for Yes!

Say YES to life and love. Say YES to new sexual experiences. Say YES to life and all its wonderful sexual possibilities.

Say YES to life and love. Say YES to new sexual experiences. Say YES to life and all its wonderful sexual possibilities.

This is one of the cornerstones that I live by. Say YES! It is also the basis of my book Soul Sex, the erotic story of a New Zealand girl traveling around the world in search of sexual enlightenment. It’s amazing how many incredible opportunities arise when you say YES to life and love.

Say yes to a Kiss

This is important also when making the decision to expand your relationship to include others sexually, by becoming part of the swinger scene or a sexually open lifestyle. Say YES to exploring different sexual combinations and be open to saying YES!

A great way to learn a lot about someone is by their kiss. How soft are their lips, how moist? Responsive? Wanting? Tentative? Tight? Passionate? Shy? Explorative?

If you are not ready to say YES to full-on sex with another person, maybe just say YES to a kiss, and see how that feels.

In my experience, the shape of a woman’s lips, their width, and fullness is a reflection of their lips below, and the moistness and openness of their mouths a direct resemblance to their pussy. Maybe this needs more research! But check it out yourself when you next kiss someone. And you can tell a lot about how a guy is going to lick your pussy by how he kisses. Is he gentle? Moist? Powerful? Intense? Shy? Respectful? Their tongues can tell you a lot, too!

I love being a sexologist and working in this field of sexual exploration with people such as yourselves - sexual adventurers.

As a young man recently shared with me, the kiss can tell you a lot about where your partner’s head is at. If you really want to have a hot, steamy night of passion, build her up to the kiss with sexual innuendoes, sexual suggestions of what you want to do to her, make her drool at the thought of you making love to her. Then kiss her. She will melt into your mouth, your arms, your bed.

But if you somehow offend her by commenting on the size of her hips or piss her off in some way by not doing what you said you would do, that kiss will say it all. She may be so mad at you, her mouth will be cold and tight. Don’t think she will willingly give it up that night!

Yet, if you find yourself in that position when you are the one that is totally pissed off and turned off… try allowing your partner to make it up to you with a kiss. Allow yourself to feel them through their kiss. Allow them to seduce you with their kiss.

Say YES to a kiss.

Then that is our challenge to melt them with our lips. With our kiss. And then melt them with our kisses down under, then work our way back into their hearts, culminating in heart-to-heart, body-to-body, breathing as one, expanding out into the universe. All is forgiven… Saying YES, gives us the opportunity to shift the energy from a negative "no, don’t feel like it" to a positive, healthy, sexually satisfying lovemaking experience. Try it! Even if you don’t feel like it, say YES and see how quickly the energy can shift. Next is Z for Zest…

Dr. Shelley

Originally from New Zealand, now based in Las Vegas, Dr Shelley has a PhD specializing in human sexuality and in particular open relationships and polyamory. She is the author of Soul Sex, and the Anti-Aging & Health Benefits of Sex. Dr Shelley teaches small group intensives, workshops and has been working with couples and individuals for 20 years focusing on making the world more sexually joyful. She is excited to share her latest writings Dr Shelley's A-Z of Sex.
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