5 Easy Steps to Relieve Your Pain... With Sex

When we are in pain, sex isn’t our number one go-to, when it should be.

Feeling some pain? Then have some sex! When we are in pain, sex isn’t our number one go-to, when it should be. Not only can the effects last for up to two days, but it also relieves most types of pains, including migraines/headaches, menstrual cramps, and back and joint aches -- especially if accompanied with an orgasm (no matter how small!).


An Orgasm a Day is the Best Medicine


When you’re in pain, and sex is (almost!) the last thing on your mind, here are some tips to override that brief uncomfortable time and get you to the orgasm that you need. I highly suggest masturbation as the tool to relive this pain, especially because you are the sexpert of your own body and finding pleasurable spots should be fairly easy.


Step #1: Get in a Comfortable Position


If you’re at home, find a place that is relaxing to you where you can be by yourself. If you’re at work/school/anywhere else, I suggest a private room, bathroom stall or your car. Anywhere where you can be alone and have peace of mind to mentally prepare yourself.


Step#2: Tell Yourself that "Pain is Temporary"


And repeat this phrase over and over again until you actually believe it. Most of the time when we continue to be in pain, we focus so much on the pain that we don’t actually focus on the relief from that pain. This is the perfect way to use your sexual energy for purpose.


Step #3: Get to a High Arousal State


After believing that your pain is temporary, think about things that turn you on THE MOST. Yes, that means going from 0-60 in two seconds. Pain and pleasure releases the same endorphins; however, increasing this production of hormones through pleasure actually increases your pain tolerance. So, think of the things that get you to an orgasm space…


Step #4: Get to Your Genitals


Whether it’s pulling your skirt up or pulling your pants down, your hand needs to find its way to your genitals. Once you find those key areas of pleasure, get to work! Remember, that you have let those thoughts of pain go away and are only focusing on the images and feelings that get you to orgasm.


Step #5: Have that Orgasm!


Hopefully, it won’t take you too long to have that orgasm, but if you’re in a lot of pain, it might take longer than usual. Again, focus on the pleasure that you’re having (or will be having!). If you are in a lot of pain, please repeat steps 1 through 5 as necessary!




After this, you will walk away feeling refreshed, pain-free and the effects could last for up to two days. On cold, winter nights where our joints tend to tighten up, this is the perfect cure to warm you up and get exactly what you need when you can’t bear the pain any longer.

Marla Stewart

Marla Renee Stewart, MA is a professional sex, intimacy and relationship coach and sex educator. Not only is she a lecturer at Clayton State University, she is also the co-founder of the Sex Down South Conference and the Sexual Liberation Collective. Gaining her reputation for being "The Sex Architect", she created Velvet Lips to empower people of all ages to embrace, educate and enjoy their sexuality and their sexual lives. She has studied human sexuality for more than 16 years at San Francisco State University and Georgia State University, respectively, and has expert knowledge in a wide variety of subjects. She has published academic articles and continues to do sexuality research. She has conducted workshops at conferences, not-for-profit and private organizations, as well as universities in the Atlanta area. She has been featured on many radio shows, documentaries, books, magazines and has been invited to speak at Universities around the country. She also sits on the board for the Atlanta Harm Reduction Coalition and SPARK Reproductive Justice Now!
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